2012 Goals — Week 2 and a Thought on Dying

The year is plowing along. Somehow a lot of activity seems to have been compressed into so few days…


Exercise in some capacity for at least 15 minutes 15 days a month. Three days of exercising (mostly stretching) this week with plans to try to talk a gentle walk tomorrow. My leg is very painful, and sometimes I can’t even stretch it out, never mind put pressure on it. When it feels fine, though, it’s absolutely 100% fine.  I have put on 20 pounds in 24 weeks of pregnancy, which is kind of horrifying, too much.  I can’t…I WON’T diet.  It’s hard with limited movement to stay active. But the stretching helps.  I’m trying to embrace what I can do.

Write here every day for at least 5 minutes and for at least 2 minutes in my “Line a Day” 5 year journal. Doing well, although I am itching to find more time to craft craft craft.  Other responsibilities call. I battle that.  As a good woman told me recently, no one will remember my housekeeping (although I’d add if it’s “Horders” level, they might) but they will remember my contributions to the world. At this point, since I am grounded on the performance tarmac, my contributions to the world are my relationships and my writing. Long view — that’s pretty awesome.

Have something I write/create be shared in a public space (à la performance, someone else publishing it, etc) by end of year. Not ready to even think about it, but I’m learning if the work and desire are there, the opportunity will present itself.

Re-learn the piano, playing at least 5 times a week (emphasis on playing) I think this will have to be put on the shelf. There is no time for this. I am already sad about it. Will save up for keyboard (88 keys) with which I can use headphones.

Make two new gal pals and/or strengthen relationship with 2 women I already know so I can consider us good friends and not just acquaintances. Waiting to hear back from women I’ve reached out to.  I am realizing that the improv women I worked with are not the best at responding to emails. The women who are in a similar place in life as I are more willing to plan a little in advance, to not stay out late. I am enjoying also being part of an online mommy group…which is not quite the same as a RL friendship, but these women are (and have been) a very special part of my life.

Figure out how to make turning 40 fabulous. Man, I am feeling rough these days, so 40 is going to be all about what a 40-year-old woman is on the inside. As. It. Should. Be.  

Take one picture a day for the entire year. Still enjoying it very much! Thank God for new iPhone!

On another note…and I hope this doesn’t sound rotten.  I’m trying to phrase it so I don’t come across as bitchy…I mean it as anything but. Someone in the improv world passed away recently. A lot of people I like and love and know and have worked with are terribly sad and posting memorial commentaries on a bunch of social networks.  I never met this man, but from the tributes, he sounds like a remarkable human who lived a remarkable life.  I heard of him 10 months ago when he first got sick.  At that time there many artists talking sadly, honestly, worriedly. But none wanted to go see him.  Lots of excuses, probably a lot of fear.  It’s not easy to be around sickness.

As someone who is not sick, just pregnant and fairly immobile, it’s isolating. It hurts.

I am POSITIVE that people visited this man. I’m sure he had a core group surrounding him. I hope every person who said that this man touched their lives let him know that before he passed.  I know it’s awkward…you start to wonder if you have the right to do that if you don’t know the person well.

I just hope I will always make the effort to visit people when sick…even if only to drop off a terrible magazine and leave.  To write a note. To give that unabashed compliment, the honest gush of how my life (and the community/family/world) has improved because of this person.

Living is lonely enough…dying should be done in a communal embrace


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