When Huzzy and I were on vacation last month, he said. “I think I’d actually like for us to have a third kid…”
Way to drop the bomb, Oppenheimer.
This was without prompting on my part. As I’ve written, I’d accepted not having a third. I believe couples should be on the same page.
I got pregnant within about two seconds…got the Big Fat Positive the day my period was due, about 9 days ago.
Other than being super-exhausted, I’ve had no symptoms, which didn’t faze me. When pregnant with the twins, my only two symptoms were exhaustion and getting really big. It was a fairly easy, mostly-complication-free pregnancy.
We were in shock. This happened quickly. It took a few days to wrap our heads around it and begin to yank the pregnancy from Idea to Reality. I was giddy. And exhausted.
Yesterday evening, we came home from a day of outdoor festivities and I was bleeding.
I woke this morning after a night of fitful sleep and was bleeding.
I called the doctor at 8. At 10:45 I called again because no one had called me back.
I was sent for a blood test. I went immediately. I will go again on Thursday. The idea is to see some specific hormones are increasing…we want them to increase.
I am still bleeding.
I will not know a thing until Friday.
I don’t feel hopeful about this and wonder if going for the blood test is a desperate grasp at optimism. I waver between accepting this pregnancy is going to end/is ending and thinking maybe everything will be ok. Mostly the former.
So I wait.